Reflection from My day Of Non Conformity

     This piece was written by me after my graduate psychology class completed several research studies on Non Conformity. Conforming is always a big Social Issue. This is just my reflection on my behavior on the day I chose to not conform. 

   My Day of non conformity was normal for me I was my usual Self.  I let my actions and words reflect my feelings. I focused on what I do everyday being myself not worried about what others think or their perception of me. To me Non conformity means not acting in a way that is expected of you. I never fit in to a group or tried to I guess that’s why pledging a sorority was awkward for me. Everyone is expected to conform while pledging. That became increasingly difficult for me and still continues to be. Pledging was a perfect example of how I DO NOT fit in with any group.

     The one thing I did decide to do differently was people are usually expected to see me “glamorous” always especially at my doctor’s office. So instead I went with my hair pulled into a ponytail and sweats and no makeup. My son could not believe I was driving him to school like that.  I’m usually very sociable, happy go lucky and Ms. Sunshine. Instead I was just cordial and polite not as friendly as I would normally be. I usually would make small talk instead I decided not to. Even though I longed to chit chat with the girls in the office and I’m sure they were wondering why I wasn’t. They would ask how I was or was I ok trying to initiate conversation. They noticed the difference right away. However they probably attributed my behavior to my possibly not feeling well since my condition causes that at times.Close  I have to admit though that I enjoyed the other me where I was social and bright, vibrant loving and connected. JOY is the makeup I put on everyday even if I don’t feel like it. It’s easier for me to be the more vibrant person.

     I observed that the psychological effects on living authentically are costly because you withdraw; you avoid social interaction and may become antisocial. Isolation is always a sign of sickness. The only benefit that I observed might be becoming one with yourself. Sometimes you have to disconnect to reconnect.  Its also important to stay mindful of how long we take to reconnect. At the same time its also fun to just take a day to do you while everyone whispers and looks at you a little strange.  But the longer you take, the reconnection may become more difficult.

     In my opinion behaving in a nonconforming manner is a psychological technique of its own; even when trying to nonconform, others will often find themselves following your lead. If everyone behaved as an individual and only said what they really felt and thought, that would probably become the new norm. If everyone acted as individual that same behavior would always be expected of them. If I were to encourage others to behave like I did that day. I would just tell them to be themselves without the extra just toning it down a little bit while keeping their regular routine and take away what others expect of them.

      Looking at my behavior one month from now I don’t feel it would not change that much. I only focused on my appearance and just cutting down on being friendly which is almost always expected of me. I realize that some things that I do fit in with a group, like my hair, my clothes how I talk. Also how I do things, although I do things according to what’s easiest and best for me not necessarily because everyone else does it.

     From participating in this, it helped me realize that sometimes we do have to take time off to disconnect. It doesn’t have to be a whole day a month or even a year. It could be just 10 minutes each day to Be Still, laugh, cry or talk with our higher power or whatever we need to do. Letting go of what everyone needs us to be and Be who we need to be.